A note from the dog himself.
July. Another month. Another heatwave. I'm beginning to think this is simply my life now.
We started where June left off — pavements like lava, walks at an hour that should not legally exist, and me conducting neighbourhood watch duties exclusively from the shade. I have adapted. I am resilient. I am also very warm.
But then — then — the weather did something remarkable. It cooled down. Just enough. The walks returned to their proper time, at a proper hour, like civilised beings. I cannot overstate how much this improved my mood. I was once again able to sniff things at a leisurely pace, greet my public, and patrol the street with the dignity the role demands. Order was restored.
Dog ice cream also made a return. Obviously. I feel it should be available year-round, regardless of temperature, and I intend to lobby for this formally. Several were consumed. For morale.
Now. The beach. We went back. The little people and I, a proper day trip — sun, sand, and smells of extraordinary quality. I paddled. I investigated. I was, by all accounts, magnificent.
You may notice someone is missing from this report. Albus was not invited. After last month's seagull incident — you can read about it here — it was decided that the beach and Albus should take a short break from one another. I supported this decision fully and without bias. The seagulls were also, I imagine, relieved. He still comes on Sundays, of course. We don't talk about the seagulls. It's an understanding.
And then there was the BBQ.
The family gathered. The garden smelled incredible. Sausages were present. I was present. It was, frankly, inevitable.
I spotted my opportunity. A sausage, unattended, at the edge of the table. I made my move — swift, elegant, professional. The sausage was acquired.
Dad saw me.
I looked at him. He looked at me. He said something. I have absolutely no idea what he was talking about. I don't speak whatever language that was. I simply held his gaze, turned slowly, and walked away with great dignity. The sausage was delicious. I regret nothing.
🐾 Reggie's Rating of the Month
Heatwave Part Two: ⭐⭐☆☆☆ (We've been through this. I have notes.)
Walks Returning to Normal: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (Justice. Finally.)
Dog Ice Cream: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (Non-negotiable. Year-round. I've submitted the paperwork.)
The Beach (Solo Mission): ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (Peaceful. Dignified. No seagull chaos. Excellent.)
Albus's Sunday Visits: ⭐⭐⭐⭐☆ (Still loud. Still my best mate. We don't discuss the seagulls.)
The Sausage: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (Worth it.)
Dad's Reaction: ⭐☆☆☆☆ (Completely overblown. I don't know what he was saying and I stand by that.)
Neighbourhood Watch Duties: ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ (Flawless, as always.)
🐾 Coming Up in August…
I have been informed — on very good authority — that August brings a ten-day holiday at the beach. The little people are coming. Albus is coming.
The seagulls have been warned.
I will report back.
Right, I'm off to supervise the garden, keep an eye on the sausage situation, and remind Mum when it's treat o'clock.
Until next month, my faithful friends…….
Paws and slobbers,
Reggie 🐾
Chief Inspiration Officer, Reggie & Co
P.S. The official investigation into the missing BBQ sausage remains ongoing. I have no further comment.
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